Together

For not the first time in her life, Fidelia felt inadequate. 

She remembered squashing that feeling down when she was little, her first year helping with her papá and abuelos. She had been jealous of Isandro for knowing more than her. She had been angry at herself for the little mistakes she made, holding back frustrated tears as Isandro fixed them. And she had been so confused why it was not coming naturally to her. Her mamá had to sit her down and talk her through it. Carefully unraveling her tearful confessions, her fears that she would never be good enough. 

It was childish, she knew looking back. Remembering her tearful frustration made her cheeks hot, burning with clear shame. And yet, it had been a horrible feeling. A genuine fear that she would never learn to be a blacksmith like her papá when that was all she wanted. That she would let him down, be a disappointment.

Qué menso.

When she had decided she had wanted to leave her home village and come to Shérok, that feeling had returned in waves. The feeling that she would fail and come back home with her tail between her legs. And instead of disappointing her papá, it had been her mamá she feared to disappoint. In a way, she had been right. It was not disappointment her mamá had, but fear. Fear that she would never return home.

They had argued as the weeks grew closer. Fidelia was never going to change her mind. She was ready to find herself, just as Papá Poncio and Mamá Eloisa had done when they were her age. It was not like she was never going to visit again. That she wouldn’t be able to care for herself. And it had hurt, painfully so, to think her mamá could not see that. That she was so adamant on having Fidelia stay forever at home.

Their goodbyes had been tense. It had taken a while for Fidelia to find the courage to write to her. Even more courage to talk to her when she visited her familia. And in the end, it turned out fine. Her mamá was proud of her. 

Yet now she was facing a new issue. One that could not be easily resolved with a heartfelt conversation.

As a native to Eredia, she had been naturally born with magic. She did not use it much - her family frowned on the idea of using the human forms. They found it unnatural. Yet, it was there. And when she and her siblings were little, they had changed into their feral forms. There was no real focus on it, it could happen. It was like putting on a shirt, a task you did automatically without thought.

But this magic?

Fidelia felt empty. 

Akeem had been growing with his prowess and she could not be prouder of him. He still did not have the visions Ocean dragons were known for but he had mastered his healing magic. For the children of the village, he did magical wonders with the water - giving them a private show. So grand, so beautiful.

She knew she was the key though to unlocking his full potential. And she felt sickened when nothing changed for her. There was supposed to be a shift inside of her. To let their bond flow freely with charged magic

And yet no matter what she did, nothing changed. 

“Fi. You want to go for a swim?”

Fidelia looked up, snapped out of her self-pity as Akeem’s gentle voice came to her. He swam closer to the dock she was sitting on, feet dangling meters above the lapping ocean. His eyes were soft as he tilted a head at her, lowering his neck so they were more eye-to-eye. She offered a half-hearted smile.

“Okay, Akeem.”

Akeem spread his wing out, laying it on the dock for her to walk on. Despite knowing his wings could handle her weight, worry still clutched at her chest whenever she stepped on them. Akeem washed calmness over her as she crossed over and slid comfortably onto his back. She placed a hand onto his neck, closing her eyes and letting her heartbeat match with Akeem’s. Already, she was feeling better than before.

The sun was starting to dip below, its orange rays shining on the ocean’s surface. Fidelia could see tiny fish swim around them, following after Akeem as he swam away from the beach. They hovered around his sides, hiding beneath where his wings laid. Akeem took no notice of them.

“What were you thinking of?” He asked as he swims into deeper water. The village was still in sight.

“Magic. You,” Fidelia simply offered, a pang of guilt hitting her in the chest. The fish around Akeem fluttered away for a moment before swimming back towards him. “I can’t - I don’t FEEL anything different. And I should.”

Akeem was quiet for a moment. The ocean didn’t ripple around them, only remaining still. 

“Who says it has to be instantaneous?” Akeem finally asked. “Things take time, Fi. And magic is tricky. I still can’t see visions. It took me a while to even get the hang of my Ocean magic. I have to work on my Wind magic.”

“I know, but,” Fidelia paused for a moment, her breath catching in her throat. She swallowed it down before continuing, pressing her forehead against Akeem’s neck in an attempt to regain control of herself. Of not breaking down into tears. “I feel I’m holding you back. That I’m not a good enough bond.”

“You are good enough. We bonded for a reason. Magic or no magic, our fates are destined. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

The reassuring words washed over Fidelia in a wave. Tears bundled up and she swallowed around a painful lump, closing her eyes tight. Comforting reassurance and warmth rushed through her, gently stroking at her frustrated mind. She wanted to apologize for doubting, for still feeling such guilt. 

Akeem must have noticed it.

“How about… we try to start off small? It may not come until we try something. If I do something.”

“Akeem,” She sighed but he shuffled his wings about, indirectly though likely purposefully, splashing water on her. Her tail fluffed up at the feeling and yet it earned a dry chuckle.

“Please?”

“Fine…”

“Don’t panic, ok?”

Fidelia would never. Not with Akeem. Opening her eyes, she quickly blinked away the budding tears before giving a pat to Akeem. A go ahead. She already knew what he was playing and she inhaled, gathering up the needed air for the dive. He was slow but purposeful as he strongly dived into the water. The salt stung at her eyes but she kept them open, her eyesight quickly getting used to its darkness.

They swam for a while, Akeem making sure to not go too deep into the ocean. The fish had not left them, still swimming around them, curious. They fluttered near Fidelia’s arms and legs before swimming away quickly if she tried to touch them. She was expecting her chest to start to burn, but nothing had happened yet. She felt, oddly, fine despite the changing of pressure and them being down longer than usual.

“...Akeem? What did you -” 

Before she could ask, a floating memory came to mind. She remembered reading about Ocean dragons after she had first bonded with Akeem. And she had been fascinated with the idea of leviathan riders, of possibly becoming one. The ability of waterbreathing.

Suddenly, her lungs felt even freer at the knowledge.

“How did you do that?” She asked and she could imagine the pleased smirk on Akeem’s face.

“We had to do this together, Fi. That’s all.”